This year is been so tough for me. Everything that's happening is extremely bad. How I wish that next year would be extremely great for me. Please Lord, be with me all the time. Keep me a better person, give me wisdom, make me strong, give me strength, inspire me and give me courage to face all the challenge that comes into my life.
Lord please show me the light, enlighten my mind and make me a good person and responsible not just for myself but also for everyone around me. Help me reach my dream and keep me positive. Please Lord help me face my life confindently and with love.
I really need you at this point of my life, please Lord don't leave me. You are the only one who left to survive me, the one who will inspire me and make me go back to the person I used to be before. I want to be strong and responsible and full of dreams.
11/17/10
my 25 years in this world
It's been 25 years ago since I was born in this world. In my 25 years, I've learned so many things. I also learned how unfair life is, how tough living in this world. Life is very confusing, challenges comes one after another or sometimes it comes together. Life sucks and make you cry, sometimes you are weak and so down that you don't have any idea what to do. You start with the question: why is this happening to me? what am I gonna do? where am I gonna start? and how could I face this? to mention a few.
Life is exciting and fun as others say and I honestly believe this. It is easy to say it though, but the easier it is to say the harder it is to do. Life will be exciting and fun if you know how to handle your life. I didn't believe that all the people live that way though, for each of us feels the same way. Each of us has each own challenge in life and has each own word to call it.
Many times I fell on the ground as I walked to continue my life's journey in this world. So many times I gave up, school, work, family and friends. I even came to the point that I didn't know who I am, what is my purpose and what is my dream. It's been so hard for me to live in this world, I blame God, my family and those people around me. But I know deep inside me that there's no one to blame but myself. I almost gave up when I realized that my life was already ruined, I want to bring back the past to correct my mistakes but unfortunately past is past...I can't bring it back no matter what I do. All that left is to accept the past and face the future.
I don't want to do what I've did before, but I am such a coward to fix my life anymore. Call me anything that you want to call, I won't get mad coz I know it's really true. I am nothing but a damn a loser.
One day I asked God, why did you gave me a chance to live in this world where I don't deserved?
Well anyway, this blog shows how am I to deal with my life. And sad to say, my life is not as exciting and fun as yours. I struggling so much and I really find life so tough.
Life is exciting and fun as others say and I honestly believe this. It is easy to say it though, but the easier it is to say the harder it is to do. Life will be exciting and fun if you know how to handle your life. I didn't believe that all the people live that way though, for each of us feels the same way. Each of us has each own challenge in life and has each own word to call it.
Many times I fell on the ground as I walked to continue my life's journey in this world. So many times I gave up, school, work, family and friends. I even came to the point that I didn't know who I am, what is my purpose and what is my dream. It's been so hard for me to live in this world, I blame God, my family and those people around me. But I know deep inside me that there's no one to blame but myself. I almost gave up when I realized that my life was already ruined, I want to bring back the past to correct my mistakes but unfortunately past is past...I can't bring it back no matter what I do. All that left is to accept the past and face the future.
I don't want to do what I've did before, but I am such a coward to fix my life anymore. Call me anything that you want to call, I won't get mad coz I know it's really true. I am nothing but a damn a loser.
One day I asked God, why did you gave me a chance to live in this world where I don't deserved?
Well anyway, this blog shows how am I to deal with my life. And sad to say, my life is not as exciting and fun as yours. I struggling so much and I really find life so tough.
10/7/10
WE’RE ALWAYS TOGETHER IN OUR HEARTS
WE’RE ALWAYS TOGETHER IN OUR HEARTS
By: Arlene
You’re in love with me
but you’re scared that I won’t like you.
I’m in love with you
Believing you won’t ever feel the same way.
Until the day a friend told me,
how you talked so much about me
It makes me wanna cry, knowing you felt the same way.
From that day, I can’t stop thinking ‘bout you.
Why I feel this way now, now that you’re gone
Gone somewhere I couldn’t see
Maybe you’re not coming back anymore
Oh baby, tell me how I could live this way NOW.
You make me smile every time I think about you,
Everything you did before just to impress me
But baby, I’m so blind that I didn’t even see.
You're the only one who can make me happy
Now tell me how could I be happy,
when I know you're not gonna be mine anymore.
We’ve never been together since before
Or maybe still won’t be in the future
But baby, I know we’re always together in our hearts.
I will never ever forget about you
We may not see each other again
But one thing I want you to know
You’ll always be a part of my life
And no one could ever take you out of my heart.
*First Flame Never Dies*
By: Arlene
You’re in love with me
but you’re scared that I won’t like you.
I’m in love with you
Believing you won’t ever feel the same way.
Until the day a friend told me,
how you talked so much about me
It makes me wanna cry, knowing you felt the same way.
From that day, I can’t stop thinking ‘bout you.
Why I feel this way now, now that you’re gone
Gone somewhere I couldn’t see
Maybe you’re not coming back anymore
Oh baby, tell me how I could live this way NOW.
You make me smile every time I think about you,
Everything you did before just to impress me
But baby, I’m so blind that I didn’t even see.
You're the only one who can make me happy
Now tell me how could I be happy,
when I know you're not gonna be mine anymore.
We’ve never been together since before
Or maybe still won’t be in the future
But baby, I know we’re always together in our hearts.
I will never ever forget about you
We may not see each other again
But one thing I want you to know
You’ll always be a part of my life
And no one could ever take you out of my heart.
*First Flame Never Dies*
10/5/10
A sad story
A Sad Story by Arlene
Edward and Bella were classmates since first year to third year high school. Edward used to impress Bella, anything that could make her near to him. Even teasing her with other guys, he did it. Bella was very innocent about his feeling she thought it was just natural and normal for a classmates to do it, since most of her classmates tease her too. She's like used to that kind of stuff.
That was 2 decades ago, there was no xerox copier at their school at that time, so the students were forced to copy everything from the blackboard through their hands. The teacher will copy it on blackboard and so do students to their notebooks. They copy four to five pages most of the time.
Since the teacher was not checking the notebooks whether the students were really copying or not. Edward always took Bella's notebook and copied the notes on the blackboard for her. Four to five pages or so can be hurt to your hand, so maybe he wants to help her. He used to borrow her notebook after school and copy it again to his notebook so that later on, on the next day he has a notes when the teacher discuss what they've copied.
Edward is very gentleman, decent, brilliant, handsome, quiet type of guy and smart. While Bella is plain, not pretty not ugly either just okay. She's decent too, brilliant, quiet and serious to her study. They have so much similarities.
Everyday they were the same, no courting or whatever just to let Bella knows what he feel. Bella has really no idea that she is hurting his feeling, but he can't blame her because he is coward to tell her the truth.
Well, she is his first love that's why he really has no idea what to do. He is very shy and coward to court her, he prefers to keep it to himself until Bella decides to transfer to other school and left him heart broken. Bella still have no idea about what he felt for her.
Since then they have no more communication.
While they were away from each other, Bella started to think about him. And started to appreciate what he did to her. Copying everything on the blackboard for her, but when their other classmates asked him to copy for them he didn't took it. He treated her so special. That's when she realized that Edward has a special feeling for her but of course she's not sure about it. Maybe it was just her who think that way.
She really wants to see him, have his number but she has no one ask about him. He's always in her mind, he makes her smile when she remember their past. Until she think she's falling with him too, but it's too late.
After a decade, one of their classmates text Bella. Just saying hi and hello and they talked about their lives till they reached the topic about love life. Jessica - their classmate's name, told her about herself and Edward. She told her that they've been together before but they're already broke up.
Bella's heart was racing so fast, she asked Jessica where he is, why they broke up and where is he working.
Jessica gave her a news about him. Edward is a Marine now, she said he is handsome and very tall. Bella was so happy to hear it, but then Jessica told her they broke up because he already has a wife and the girl is already having their baby. They don't have formal break up, since they were away from each other because of his work. They were just broke up through cellphone.
Bella was like too weak when she heard about it, she has no more reason to think about him or to wait for him. He is already has a family and being with him is not gonna happen anymore.
On their last conversation Jessica told her "you know what? he used to talk about you all the time" that's when she realized how Edward loved her before or maybe till now but he is also have no news about her. Remembering her the way she does about him is an answer to her question and a confirmation they are both in love with each other.
She was so happy to hear about it, at the same time she was heart broken that her wish to be with him won't ever happen anymore.
She thinks that when they only have a communication maybe Edward is still single or maybe they are together. How she wish Edward has a news about her, for that maybe he didn't decide to get married for other girl.
Until now Edward and Bella still have no communication. Bella starts to accept it and be thankful for that memories she have of him. Such a great memories that will treasure as long as she lives. He's part of her life and she knows she's been part of his life too.
They are physically away from each other but in their minds and in their hearts they are always together and in love to each other no matter what will happen. She is his first love and he is her first love too. First love never dies right??? the love between them will always be in their heart and no one could ever take that away from them.
What a sad story isn't it? Honestly, this makes me wanna cry. Wish the part two is coming soon LOL. Wish the characters will meet on the next part.
Lesson???? always learn to appreciate every single and big thing that others have done unto you.
Edward and Bella were classmates since first year to third year high school. Edward used to impress Bella, anything that could make her near to him. Even teasing her with other guys, he did it. Bella was very innocent about his feeling she thought it was just natural and normal for a classmates to do it, since most of her classmates tease her too. She's like used to that kind of stuff.
That was 2 decades ago, there was no xerox copier at their school at that time, so the students were forced to copy everything from the blackboard through their hands. The teacher will copy it on blackboard and so do students to their notebooks. They copy four to five pages most of the time.
Since the teacher was not checking the notebooks whether the students were really copying or not. Edward always took Bella's notebook and copied the notes on the blackboard for her. Four to five pages or so can be hurt to your hand, so maybe he wants to help her. He used to borrow her notebook after school and copy it again to his notebook so that later on, on the next day he has a notes when the teacher discuss what they've copied.
Edward is very gentleman, decent, brilliant, handsome, quiet type of guy and smart. While Bella is plain, not pretty not ugly either just okay. She's decent too, brilliant, quiet and serious to her study. They have so much similarities.
Everyday they were the same, no courting or whatever just to let Bella knows what he feel. Bella has really no idea that she is hurting his feeling, but he can't blame her because he is coward to tell her the truth.
Well, she is his first love that's why he really has no idea what to do. He is very shy and coward to court her, he prefers to keep it to himself until Bella decides to transfer to other school and left him heart broken. Bella still have no idea about what he felt for her.
Since then they have no more communication.
While they were away from each other, Bella started to think about him. And started to appreciate what he did to her. Copying everything on the blackboard for her, but when their other classmates asked him to copy for them he didn't took it. He treated her so special. That's when she realized that Edward has a special feeling for her but of course she's not sure about it. Maybe it was just her who think that way.
She really wants to see him, have his number but she has no one ask about him. He's always in her mind, he makes her smile when she remember their past. Until she think she's falling with him too, but it's too late.
After a decade, one of their classmates text Bella. Just saying hi and hello and they talked about their lives till they reached the topic about love life. Jessica - their classmate's name, told her about herself and Edward. She told her that they've been together before but they're already broke up.
Bella's heart was racing so fast, she asked Jessica where he is, why they broke up and where is he working.
Jessica gave her a news about him. Edward is a Marine now, she said he is handsome and very tall. Bella was so happy to hear it, but then Jessica told her they broke up because he already has a wife and the girl is already having their baby. They don't have formal break up, since they were away from each other because of his work. They were just broke up through cellphone.
Bella was like too weak when she heard about it, she has no more reason to think about him or to wait for him. He is already has a family and being with him is not gonna happen anymore.
On their last conversation Jessica told her "you know what? he used to talk about you all the time" that's when she realized how Edward loved her before or maybe till now but he is also have no news about her. Remembering her the way she does about him is an answer to her question and a confirmation they are both in love with each other.
She was so happy to hear about it, at the same time she was heart broken that her wish to be with him won't ever happen anymore.
She thinks that when they only have a communication maybe Edward is still single or maybe they are together. How she wish Edward has a news about her, for that maybe he didn't decide to get married for other girl.
Until now Edward and Bella still have no communication. Bella starts to accept it and be thankful for that memories she have of him. Such a great memories that will treasure as long as she lives. He's part of her life and she knows she's been part of his life too.
They are physically away from each other but in their minds and in their hearts they are always together and in love to each other no matter what will happen. She is his first love and he is her first love too. First love never dies right??? the love between them will always be in their heart and no one could ever take that away from them.
What a sad story isn't it? Honestly, this makes me wanna cry. Wish the part two is coming soon LOL. Wish the characters will meet on the next part.
Lesson???? always learn to appreciate every single and big thing that others have done unto you.
9/21/10
I want to save my life
I really wanna take it back but I can't. What am I gonna do now???? I want to be positive, I still have time I know that. Better late than never right? I hope next year I can go to Australia. Please pray for me. Help me save my Life.
I really hope everything is gonna be fine soon. I don't have to be felt so lost, I will put my trust to God.
I really hope everything is gonna be fine soon. I don't have to be felt so lost, I will put my trust to God.
I want to go to Australia now
Sorry about my previous post. I'm really sad and feel so miserable about the status of my life. I regret so much for letting this happened. I'm such a coward and I always put the fear on the top of everything. That's the big reason why I didn't succeed. I wanna punch myself so fucking hard, I want to awake myself from this shit dreams. I want to change, I want to do something but I just didn't know how and where to start.
My sister keeps on telling me that maybe next couple of months we will start processing your paper so I can go to Australia. But God until now I'm still here, still can't find a work because of that. I supposed to go to Australia last year, they told me to prepare for the IELTS. Instead of finding a job, I didn't coz I prepared for IELTS but after that they told me I'm not going with my sister. She will go alone without me :( She is older than me so they will take her first.
I've waited for so long, I didn't find a job knowing they will start processing my visa. Now they are telling me, early next year. Hope this one will be sure, I really wanna go there, I want to start living. As time goes by I'm getting old, it's time to start my career and work so hard. I want to fill up those missing years I've been free out of work.
To my sister please, do anything to take me here :( I'll pay you later as long as I'm done with my study and have work. Please, I'm so old now I want to work and reach my dreams. I want to start it right now, I'm already late. PLEASE!
My sister keeps on telling me that maybe next couple of months we will start processing your paper so I can go to Australia. But God until now I'm still here, still can't find a work because of that. I supposed to go to Australia last year, they told me to prepare for the IELTS. Instead of finding a job, I didn't coz I prepared for IELTS but after that they told me I'm not going with my sister. She will go alone without me :( She is older than me so they will take her first.
I've waited for so long, I didn't find a job knowing they will start processing my visa. Now they are telling me, early next year. Hope this one will be sure, I really wanna go there, I want to start living. As time goes by I'm getting old, it's time to start my career and work so hard. I want to fill up those missing years I've been free out of work.
To my sister please, do anything to take me here :( I'll pay you later as long as I'm done with my study and have work. Please, I'm so old now I want to work and reach my dreams. I want to start it right now, I'm already late. PLEASE!
9/17/10
we are born to be this way
Life is wonderful if you know how to handle it. Problems, disappointments and frustrations are part of being a human. We can't avoid them, each and everyone of us has each own challenge in life. All we have to do is to be strong and face all of them positively and with love. If you think your problem is very tough, always remember that there are bunch of people out there who are facing more than what you have.
We are born to be a fighter of what we so called life. There is no reason to give up, as long as we have someone around who loved us and will love us. I know saying all these things are easy but doing it aren't.
Thinking positive things help us to be strong and be inspired. We need these, we need people who will lift us up when we are down or when we feel sad and weak. This is just a word but it can make you incredibly different the way you respond to your problem. Live life by accepting what you are and what you have.
We are born to be a fighter of what we so called life. There is no reason to give up, as long as we have someone around who loved us and will love us. I know saying all these things are easy but doing it aren't.
Thinking positive things help us to be strong and be inspired. We need these, we need people who will lift us up when we are down or when we feel sad and weak. This is just a word but it can make you incredibly different the way you respond to your problem. Live life by accepting what you are and what you have.
9/13/10
5 Ways to improve your English
English plays big role in our lives. We need to have a competitive English for us to find a good job and adequate salary for ourselves and for our family. In order to master your grammar, you need to learn and study hard. So what are the different ways to improve your English?? read my tips below.
Note: in watching movies, try to watch it 3-5 times without subtitles and then watch it again with subtitles. Check your listening if what you've heard is correct.
Make Speaking, reading, listening and writing english as your daily habit! I hope my tips help you improve your english! Good luck with your study. We can do it!!!
FirstRead English books, if there's an audio book it's better. Read comics, magazines, newspaper, anything that you could read as long as it is written in English. For instance, reading billboards, sign boards, etc. If you have a favorite book it is advisable to read it 5-10 times, it can help you familiarize each word and save it deeply to your mind.
SecondWatch english movies, tv series, news, interviews, any videos as long as it is english. You can find english videos at youtube, try to listen to the conversation. Understand what they are saying and follow their pronunciation.
Note: in watching movies, try to watch it 3-5 times without subtitles and then watch it again with subtitles. Check your listening if what you've heard is correct.
ThirdListen to English news on radio. Listening to english music can help too, try to understand the lyrics and the usage of the words. Listen to music or any audio when you are on your way to school or work. For example if you are on the bus, don't waste your time sitting why don't you turn on your cellphone or ipod and listen to it.
FourthBlogging can help a lot. Try to create a blogsite and blog your life or anything you want to say. Remember using those words you've learned everyday can help you remember the word, its meaning at the same time its usage. As months, weeks or even days pass by we tend to forget some words we learned. Through blogging, it can help you minimize the number of words lose. In addition, you can also write poems, short stories, fan fiction or writing song lyrics.
FifthTalk to anyone from other countries. When you are talking to foreigners you are force to speak english otherwise they can't understand you. Having an online friends is another way of learning english. There are millions of english site out there, why don't you try to sign up and start chatting to other people who are also learning english?
Make Speaking, reading, listening and writing english as your daily habit! I hope my tips help you improve your english! Good luck with your study. We can do it!!!
