My big flop

What the hell, I did my listening practice test this afternoon and I got 19 out of 40 and the equivalent says I did not get an acceptable score on the IELTS test and they recommend me to practice more and answer more lessons. I was like what the fuc**ng hell am I gonna do now? I was totally disappointed by my result. Oh God, heavenly father please please help me, I’m begging you.

The listening test is suppose to be the easy one, but I got failed how much more the reading, writing and speaking? I’m afraid I’m going to hell when I won’t pass the exam. I am so feeling bad now, I hate myself for having this lame brain. I want to scream out loud to let people know how stupid I am.

I’m like a child now, I act like a child and think like a child. I am mature enough to descipline myself and stopped myself of doing things that can disturb me and take my time away from studying. I know this is my fault, I am lazy and don’t have courage and patience to stick with my mission. I am such a loser, a loser!

After I’ve finished the listening test I proceeded to reading test and the worst thing happened. I can’t understand the topic, it was too long, I was running out of time. I haven’t fisnished the question yet and my time was over. I really can’t figure out myself in the final exam. I don’t know what to do, I have to take the exam on March 6 of this year. I am so not prepared and my english is still limited. Please wish me luck guys, I hope I will succeed in all my undertakings, especially my IELTS.

IELTS is my door to reach my goals in life, please help me not to go to hell, I don’t wanna die yet but my sister might kill me in case I failed.